Welcome to the Second Level: Part 3

Today I want to talk with you about an interesting level of duality. So what do I mean by interesting? Well, so far in my previous posts on duality (here and here), we’ve looked at the either/or nature of duality and how we have to deal with one or the other. Now, I want to get into two areas where the duality is not so cut and dry. Where the duality is more of a perception than an actuality.

Action and Non-action

At first, these appear to be like any other type of duality that we deal with. It’s when you look deeper into what is really going on that you then see that something is different here. Something has definitely changed with respect to the either/or concept. Let me give you an example. If you are running, that is an action. If you stop running, that too is an action and you could say that it’s a non-action because you are no longer in the act of running. While that is true in the sense that you are not running, it is not true in the sense that you are no longer taking action.

This is where it gets into deeper territory on a metaphysical level. When you look at it from this level, you see that everything we do is an action. No matter how you want to phrase it, or look at it or conceive of it, everything is an action. There is, in fact, no time at which we are not in the process of being in an action. This is where the bonds of duality start to slip. There is no up/down, in/out type of duality when talking about action. There is only the single face of it. By understanding this concept, it gives us the ability to see deeper into who and what we are, and to realize that all we do is action. So, where does this action come from?

To Be, Or Not To Be

While that’s not necessarily the question (apologies to the Bard) it does bring us to another level of concept where duality goes sideways. The concept is choices and decisions and the ones we make. Just like with actions, at first it appears to have duality insofar as we either decide (choose) do to something or not. However, once we again look deeper into it we find that everything we do is based on a choice/decision and even when we choose/decide not to do something, we still have made a choice/decision.

We cannot escape making decisions. Ever. Indeed, while the choices we make will have the concept of duality embedded in them (all choices are basically either/or choices) we cannot stop making choices and decisions. Just like action, decision-making is never ending. There is only one side to it. Can you see what I mean by this? Do you start to get some of what this implies as to how we can live our lives in a clearer way?

You see, to be or not to be actually is the question. Because everything is your choice and your actions are dictated by those choices and decisions, by acknowledging that you are in a constant state of deciding and action taking, your personal responsibility for yourself comes to the forefront. Once you realize this and that you are indeed the master of your life, you can now make better decisions, and consequently, take better actions that will help you to become better in all aspects of your life.

Making A Positive Choice

Sit in meditation and look at your decisions and the actions that you’ve taken. Do this as neutrally as possible and simply see how you have made certain choices and done certain things. There is no right or wrong here and definitely no blame. There is only what is. Notice how many of your decisions were made from a negative emotional space and how many were from a positive space. See how the ones that came from the positive space have benefited you greatly and how the ones made from the negative space have been anywhere from annoying to truly devastating.

When you look at these decisions and actions from this neutral space, you see that you are the only creator in your life. You see how you are the only one who can make a decision or take an action for yourself from whatever emotional stance you wish. Now you can become a truly aware architect of your life. May you choose wisely. =)

Bright Blessings.

Ross – “Tolemac”

The Power To Change Is In Your Hands

Most people stop themselves from accomplishing and achieving what they would really like and want to do in life mainly because they do not have the belief in themselves that they can make the changes necessary. Typically, these are the people that say words like “I can’t” and “if only”. It is not often that they realize that they are the ones that have the power within themselves to achieve anything they desire, if they are only willing to change themselves.

Typically, people think that change is completely beyond their control and so they feel totally powerless to do anything that can change the situation they find themselves in. However by changing ourselves and our outlook on life, we then begin to take charge of our lives and make the changes needed. By changing how you think and feel about yourself and your circumstances, you give yourself the power to change your life to the one you want. One where everything is possible and is within easy reach. Here are a couple of simple methods to get you started in making the changes you want.

What is it that you want from life?

The very first step to changing your life is to decide what it is exactly that you want to change in yourself and/or your life. Is there some particular aspect in your life that you want to change? Is there something about you as a person you feel needs changing? You need to write down specifically what it is that you wish to change, making as complete a list of everything that you aren’t happy about as possible, and the changes you believe you need to make.

Get out a legal size sheet of paper, and make two headlines at the top. Mark the first one on the upper left as “Things I want to change” and mark the second one on the upper right as “How I will change them” Now, you can number down the left hand side if you wish, and list out first, all the things in you and your life you want to change. Be completely honest and as specific as possible. Once you’ve listed those out, go back to the top and start on the right hand column and list how you are going to make the changes for each one. Again, be specific and honest.

If you want to actually make these changes, you have to come from as open a place inside yourself as possible. Self delusion, or hiding what is real will only keep you from making the changes you want. The way we feel about ourselves and see ourselves, has everything to do with how we see life. If we are full of fear, self-doubt and lack of confidence, this shows in how we present ourselves to the world and to our own selves.

Change your mind, change your life

Self-doubt will get you down really quickly, so one of the first steps you’ll need to do to accomplish taking your life back into your own hands is to change your basic outlook.
You need to realize that it is you and only you that has the power to change and the secret to this is freeing your mind and body from fear and doubts so that you can start to move forward and begin making the changes you want. Allowing yourself to have a more positive attitude will help you to be able to change the way you feel and react to any situation.

More importantly, it will help you with what you are able to achieve. You will be able to do this because with a different attitude towards life in general, you will see things differently and you’ll experience them differently, with more confidence and self-assuredness. Also, others around you will be more responsive to you and your needs and they will appreciate how you are better able to handle situations. This in turn will give you even more self confidence.

Of necessity, the changes you make should be small at first, as you don’t want to add the stress of trying to accomplish huge changes on the hurry up. Soon though, you will begin to realize that the changes are happening and that it is you that is making them happen. You’ll realize that you don’t have to rely on anyone else.

Along with these positive changes, you will feel better, have more self-esteem, confidence, be more enthusiastic and be more self-motivated. Whenever I finish with a healing client, I have them look in the mirror so that they can see immediately how they look better than they did before, both physically and energetically. Recognize the positive changes you are making and celebrate them! Validate yourself for every step you take. This positive re-enforcement goes a long way to helping you make even bigger changes, and making them quicker.

Taking and accepting responsibility

Taking full responsibility for your life is a magical thing. It can immediately remove the idea of “blame”. By accepting total responsibility and realizing that you alone hold the power to make the changes you want, you will bring incredible self-satisfaction to yourself. Remember, “responsibility” is simply being “able to respond” So, when you take a deep and totally truthful look at your life, you will easily see that you and you alone made the decisions that brought you to where you are.

Sure, other people and situations influenced your decisions, but ultimately, you are the one who agreed to them. By not “blaming” anything or anyone outside of yourself, you really are free to make even better decisions. The idea here is not to blame yourself either. The idea is to accept the way you dealt with whatever came along, forgive yourself if it didn’t turn out like you wanted it to and to move forward toward better choices, and to acknowledge yourself if the changes and decisions you make work out for you.

Too often, people are very quick to judge themselves harshly when things go awry, but rarely allow themselves to feel good for things that turn out the way they wanted or needed. By taking responsibility for your life, you can say honestly and completely, “I did that” whether it was “good ” or “not so good”. This will give you a freedom that most people will never experience.

Here are a few quick tips to help you make changes in your life:

  • Find a self-help course to attend.

    Most people will need a guiding hand to get them going when they first start out to make the changes they want in their life. There is absolutely nothing wrong with seeking out help at this time, and one of the best ways to do that is to attend a workshop or course that can help you get the advice and support you need so that you can take control in a safe environment.

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  • Read self-help books and/or watch DVD’s..

    If you are unable to attend a class or workshop, then getting motivational DVD’s and self-help books is the next best thing to being there. While you won’t have the interaction, you can still find plenty of inspiration to get you going on the right path.

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  • Clean up your space.

    Clutter in the environment leads to clutter in the mind. One of the best ways to prepare for the changes you want to make, is to change the energy of the space where you live. Get rid of the old energy by doing a thorough cleaning and by removing objects that either are no longer useful, or invoke negative feelings. Recycle old clothing and let go of anything that distracts you from what you want to accomplish. Read up on Feng Shui, or if there’s one in your area, hire a consultant to come in and help you re-set the energy of your home. This one tip goes a very long way to getting you into the right mind set to create a better you.

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    Finally, remember to love yourself and to be your own best friend. If you don’t like and love yourself, how can anyone else? By treating yourself with love, forgiveness and respect, others will treat you that way as well.

    Deep Peace and Brightest Blessings!